116 KB42 KB200420252025Domines Veliki, Martinaštevilka:2letnik:22str. 49-60DOI:10.4312/elope.22.2.49-60ISSN:1581-8918COBISSID_HOST:265799427URN:URN:NBN:SI:doc-2QJ5K9AHenZaložba Univerze v LjubljaniELOPE (Ljubljana)art as a form of self-expressionchildhood trauma/painconcept of timedisociacijadissociationmemoryotroška travma/bolečinapojem časaspominumetnost kot oblika izražanja sebeTraumatic memory in Eve Ensler’s The apology (2019)|Eve Ensler’s memoir The Apology (2019) traces Ensler’s growing up with an abusive father who raped her during her childhood and never apologized for the damage he caused. Ensler, now a successful woman in her sixties, thus imagines her father’s apology and details everything she was going through. Unlike Caruth’s theory of traumatic aporia where painful experiences are inherently contradictory and can never be grasped completely, Ensler’s act of writing the unspoken words of her father points to the fact that trauma can be healed through writing. As Richard McNelly and Joshua Pederson claim, it is precisely through writing that the victim can gain control over the act of recalling, helping the survivor to remake the self. Thus, in Ensler’s memoir, Caruth’s traumatic amnesia is replaced by the power of remembered and written detail to enact healing. This essay addresses issues of incest and rape through the lens of more recent trauma theory by paying attention to an imagined act of the perpetrator’s apology. By evoking pseudo memories, Ensler tries to understand her childhood trauma and how it affected her as a person. She establishes herself as a truth-teller and the survivor of intergenerational trauma with the ability to break the cycle of abuse, which is exactly what she does by writing The ApologyAvtobiografija Eve Ensler The Apology (2019) opisuje njeno odraščanje z nasilnim očetom, ki jo je v otroštvu posilil in se nikoli ni opravičil za škodo, ki jo je povzročil. Zato si avtorica, zdaj uspešna ženska pri šestdesetih, predstavlja očetovo opravičilo, v katerem podrobno opisuje vse, kar je prestala. Za razliko od Caruthove teorije travmatične aporije, po kateri so boleče izkušnje v osnovi protislovne in jih ni mogoče v celoti dojeti, Eve Ensler z zapisovanjem neizrečenih besed svojega očeta pokaže, da je travmo mogoče pozdraviti s pisanjem. Kot trdita Richard McNelly in Joshua Pederson lahko žrtev prav z pisanjem pridobi nadzor nad spominjanjem, kar ji pomaga ponovno oblikovati svoje sebstvo. Tako v avtoričinih spominih Caruthovo travmatsko amnezijo nadomešča moč zapomnjenih in zapisanih podrobnosti, ki omogočajo ozdravitev. Ta esej obravnava vprašanja incesta in posilstva skozi prizmo novejše teorije travme, pri čemer se osredotoča na domišljijsko opravičilo storilca. Z vzbujanjem »psevdo« spominov poskuša avtorica razumeti svojo otroško travmo in kako je ta vplivala nanjo. S pisanjem knjige The Apology se avtorica vzpostavi kot vir resnice in kot žrtev travme, ki je sposobna prekiniti začarani krog zlorabTEXTznanstveno časopisjejournalsSlovenian National E-content AggregatorNational and University Library of SloveniaUniverza v Ljubljani, Filozofska fakulteta