SMRT IN .ALOVANJE V BEGUNSTVU: BO.NJAKI, BO.NJAKINJE V SLOVENIJI Natalija Vreeer Kljuene besede: .alovanje, (kulturna) ovdovelost, Bo.njaki, Bo.njakinje, begunci, begunke, Slovenija Uvod V prieujoeem elanku se nameravam osredotoeiti na smrt in .alovanje Bo.njakov in Bo.njakinj, ki so v Sloveniji v begunstvu. Po mojem mnenju je njihovo .ivljenje te.ko razumeti, ee se izognemo njihovemu sreeanju s smrtjo, ki so ga do.iveli kot gro.njo svojemu lastnemu .ivljenju, saj so bila v domovini njihova .ivljenja pogosto ogro.ena ali pa so jim v vojni umrli sorodniki in prijatelji. Prav tako ne moremo razumeti ljudi v begunski situaciji, ee se ne sooeimo z razlienimi simbolnimi smrtmi, ki so znaeilne za vse begunce in begunke, ki sem jih spoznala. Vsi so namree do.iveli vee naslednjih izgub: izgubo domovine s socio-kulturnim okoljem, jezika, zaposlitve, .olanja, drastieno so se jim spremenile socialne mre.e, do.iveli so padec standarda itd. Trdimo lahko torej, da so procesi .alovanja za .ivljenje v begunstvu znaeilni in da potekajo na osebni in kolektivni ravni. .ege Bo.njakov ob smrti so zelo specifiene. Razlikujejo se od slovenskih. Moja teza je, da odsotnost integracije beguncev in begunk v Sloveniji povzroea negativne posledice tudi v procesih .alovanja beguncev in begunk. Bo.njaki lahko v Sloveniji .ege ob smrti v skladu s svojo tradicijo izvajajo v veeji ali manj.i meri. Na nekaterih pokopali.eih jim ne dovolijo koneati pogrebih .eg v skladu z njihovo tradicijo, kot bom pokazala v sklepnem delu elanka. Menim, da bi jim mo.nost dokoneanja pogrebnih .eg v skladu s tradicijo omogoeila, da bi procese .alovanja bolj ueinkovito predelali, poleg tega pa to za slovensko dr.avo ne bi pomenilo dodatnih stro.kov. V tem elanku bom predstavila nekaj statistienih dejstev o beguncih in begunkah v Sloveniji, opisala metodologijo, analizirala literaturo o smrti, .alovanju in ovdovelosti, ki je vplivala na istovrstno literaturo v begunstvu, analizirala literaturo na omenjeno temo v begunstvu in na kratko opisala .ege Bo.njakov in Bo.njakinj v Slove Natalija Vreeer niji ob smrti. V besedilu bom posku.ala dati tudi napotke za izbolj.anje politike re.evanja begunskega vpra.anja v povezavi s sfero smrti, zlasti za primer Bo.njakov, Bo .njakinj v Sloveniji. Pisala bom tudi o kulturni ovdovelosti, ki jo Eisenbruch (1990) opredeljuje kot izgubo kulture in dru.be in obsega procese kolektivnega .alovanja. Nana.a se torej na razliene simbolne smrti in na izkustvo begunstva kot celote.1 Begunci, begunke v Sloveniji in metodologija Prvi begunci, begunke so bili Hrvati in Hrvatice, ki so zaeeli prihajati v Slovenijo kmalu po njeni neodvisnosti v juniju 1991. Bo.njaki in Bo.njakinje so se jim pridru.ili, 322 pridru.ile leta 1992. V septembru 1993 je bilo v Sloveniji 35.000 beguncev in begunk in nekaj tisoe tistih, ki niso bili evidentirani.2 Status bosanskih beguncev in begunk je bil in .e vedno je zaeasen. Po slovenskem Zakonu o zatoei.eu iz leta 1997 jih imenujejo iskalci zaeasnega zatoei.ea. V Sloveniji smo status begunca po .enevski konvenciji o statusu begunca iz leta 1951 podelili le trem osebam. Po omenjenem zakonu se lahko zaposlujejo le osem ur na teden. Repatriacija iz Slovenije poteka prostovoljno, ne prisiljeno. Aprila 1999 je v Sloveniji pribli.no 3500 beguncev in begunk iz Bosne in Hercegovine, pribli.no 80 % je Bo.njakov in Bo.njakinj. Pribli.no polovica jih .ivi v desetih begunskih zbirnih centrih, drugi pa v zasebnih namestitvah. Poleg njih je v Sloveniji .e 2500 beguncev in be- gunk s Kosova brez ustreznega pravnega statusa. Niso namree niti begunci, begunke po .enevski konvenciji o statusu begunca iz leta 1951 niti iskalci zaeasnega zatoei.ea po slovenskem Zakonu o zaeasnem zatoei.eu, temvee tujci pred odstranitvijo.3 Za Slovenijo je znaeilna odsotnost integracije beguncev in begunk. Otroci in najstniki obiskujejo .ole in se na ta naein v veeji meri integrirajo v slovensko dru.bo kot druge socialne skupine. Na ta naein imajo mo.nost, da se naueijo sloven.eine, medtem ko veeina njihovih star.ev ostaja v begunskih zbirnih centrih in nima toliko mo.nosti vkljueevanja v kulturo dr.ave gostiteljice. Begunci in begunke v Sloveniji ostajajo torej v negotovosti svojega zaeasnega statusa in v .praznini. eakajo na repatriacijo. Njihova situacija spominja na Beckettovo eakanje na Godota, saj so njihove hi.e v Bosni in Hercegovini unieene ali pa so jih zasedli Srbi (zlasti tiste v Republiki srbski). Mo.nost vrnitve je nejasna, postavljena nekam v daljno bodoenost. Metoda mojega raziskovanja je bila etnografska. Od avgusta 1992 do decembra 1994 sem opravljala terensko delo v Celju, od januarja 1995 do zdaj v Ljubljani. Obiskala sem tudi begunski zbirni center v Mariboru. 1 angle.ko: cultural bereavement 2 Zahvaljujem se Uradu za priseljevanje in begunce za statistiene podatke. 3 V aprilu 1999 se je Slovenija odloeila, da bo sprejela .e dodatnih 1600 beguncev in begunk s Kosova, ki po stopoma prihajajo v Slovenijo, in da bo reaktivirala Zakon o zaeasnem zatoei.eu tudi za kosovske begunce in begunke. Smrt in .alovanje v begunstvu: Bo.njaki, Bo.njakinje v Sloveniji Smrt, .alovanje in ovdovelost v medkulturni perspektivi: .tudije, ki so vplivale na tiste z isto temo v begunstvu Zaradi omejenega prostora, ki mi je na voljo za prieujoe elanek, se bom osredotoeila le na glavne avtorje in avtorice, iz katerih so erpali tisti in tiste, ki so pisali, pisale o smrti, .alovanju in ovdovelosti v begunstvu. Eden izmed najzgodnej.ih in .e vedno eden izmed najpomembnej.ih je bil nedvomno Freudov esej .alovanje in melanholija (1917). V njem Freud uporablja izraz melanholija za to, kar danes imenujemo depresija. Eden izmed najpomembnej.ih Freudovih doprinosov je, da je posveeal pozornost intrapsihienim procesom, ki se dogajajo ob izgubah. Po Freudu je .alovanje proces, ki ga je potrebno prede-323 lati, da bi se lahko koneal, postopen umik libida ali emocionalne energije od izgubljenega objekta je potreben, da bi se lahko ta emocionalna energija vezala na nov objekt. Freudov esej je za begunske .tudije pomemben zaradi naslednjih ugotovitev: 1. .alovanje je normalen proces, za katerega je potreben doloeen eas, da se tako imenovani posli .alovanja lahko predelajo. Torej ni patolo.ka reakcija. Freud poda tudi zelo dober vpogled v situacije, v katerih so procesi .alovanja ovirani. Dejstvo, da ljudje, in .e zlasti begunci in begunke, potrebujejo eas za .alovanje (poudarek N. V.), so omenjali in omenjale tudi kasnej.i avtorji in avtorice kot, na primer Englund (1998), Eisenbruch (1984), Harrell-Bond in Wilson (1990). Po njihovem mnenju bi morali to upo.tevati zlasti tisti zdravstveni delavci in delavke, ki so se usposabljali na Zahodu, in ne bi smeli patologizirati reakcij, kot se to .e vedno prepogosto dogaja. Dojemanje .alovanja kot bolezni je zlasti prisotno med psihologi in nekaterimi psihiatri, kot, na primer, pri Engelu (1961), Sandersevi (1989) in drugih. Sanderseva opredeljuje eustva .alovanja kot simptome, in na .alost ni edina, ki ima tak pristop. 2. Po mnenju Freuda je depresija .na doloeen naein povezana z izgubo objekta, ki ni v sferi zavednega, v nasprotju z .alovanjem, kjer izgube so v sferi zavednega. (1917: 245). V begunski situaciji, kjer veliko izgub nastopi naenkrat, je zelo verjetno, da nekatere, in zlasti naein njihovega prepletanja (prim. z Malkki 1995), lahko beguneevemu, begunkinemu zavednemu ostajajo skrite in jih zato te.je predelajo. Da bi pojasnili stopnje pri procesih .alovanja, veliko avtorjev in avtoric posega po psihologiji. Ba.kauskas (1981) pi.e o beguncih, begunkah iz Litve v Zdru.enih dr.avah Amerike in sledi Marrisovim stopnjam v procesu .alovanja, ki so konzervatizem, ovdovelost in inovacija. Po psihologinji Sandersevi (1989) so te stopnje naslednje: 1. .ok 2. zavedanje 3. konzervativna stopnja - umik 4. zdravljenje - preobrat 5. obnovitev. Ne glede na to, da je tak.na analiza obeasno uporabna, moramo biti previdni, da je ne posplo.ujemo. Te stopnje se namree od kulture do kulture in tudi od posamez Natalija Vreeer nika do posameznika razlikujejo (prim. z Stroebe, v: Firth 1997: 9/10). Vsak posameznik v vsaki dru.bi do.ivlja v svojem .ivljenju izgube, ki so posledice izgube objektov, na katere smo bili eustveno navezani. Torej je .alovanje znaeilno za vsako kulturo. Ne glede na to pa je v procesih .alovanja veliko medkulturnih razlik. Prav tako razlieni so naeini izra.anja eustev .alovanja. Rosenblatt, Walsh in Jackson so delali raziskave v 78 kulturah na podlagi etnografskih opisov. Ena izmed njihovih ugotovitev je, na primer, da imajo potlaeitev eustev v nekaterih kulturah za normalno (Bali), medtem ko se v nekaterih drugih kulturah zdi pomembno, da se vezi z umrlimi ohranjajo (Egipt). Veeina literature se osredotoea na vlogo obredov pri .alovanju. Flammov pregled 324 daje teoretsko ozadje te problematike in se osredotoea na antropolo.ko in psiholo.ko literaturo (1994 a). Eden izmed pogosto citiranih avtorjev je Hertz, ki je pojmoval ..ege ob smrti kot refleksijo socialnega reda, ki pa je objektivni izraz konceptov in vrednot dru.be. (citirano v Flamm 1994 a: 4). Bloch in Parry pa, na primer, trdita, da obredi ustvarjajo dru.beni red, in gledata na te rituale kot na politieno dejanje, ki pomaga legitimizirati obstojeeo avtoriteto v dru.bi (1982, citirano v Flamm 1994 a: 6). Rosenblatt, Walsh in Jackson se opirajo na Van Gennepa. Po njihovem mnenju .ege ob smrti omogoeajo statusni prehod, tako za mrtve kot ovdovele. Skozi ciklus .eg ob smrti se mrtva oseba preseli iz zemlje .ivih v zemljo mrtvih, ovdoveli osebi pa preneha status .alujoeega in dobi status tistega, tiste, ki ne .aluje vee. (1976: 7). Leach je bil mnenja, da obstaja preprieanje, da je obred univerzalno dejstvo. Na obred gleda kot na socialni fenomen, ki posreduje temeljne koncepte in vrednote dane dru.be. Pogrebne .ege pomagajo .alujoeim, da se ponovno reintegrirajo v dru.bo in omogoeajo .ir.i dru.beni skupini, da vzdr.uje kontinuiteto in znova utrdi svoje vrednote in verovanja (v: Flamm 1994 a: 8-9). Mnogi avtorji opozarjajo, da pomanjkanje .eg ob smrti, ko so pogrebne .ege koneane, na Zahodu ustvarja nadaljnje probleme za ovdovele, saj ni sklepnih obredov, ki bi doloeili easovno mejo .alovanja. Na ta naein se .alovanje podalj.uje (Rosenblatt, Walsh & Jackson 1976, Firth 1997 itd.). Drugi pomembni avtorji in avtorice so: Van Gennep (1908), Durkheim (1915), Goody (1962), Radcliffe-Brown (1964), Gorer (1965), Turner (1969), Munroz (1984), Bloch in Parry (1982), Bloch (1988), itd. Medkulturna literatura o .alovanju in (kulturni) ovdovelosti v begunstvu Zaeela se je pojavljati v osemdesetih letih, ko so se begunske .tudije uveljavile kot samostojna akademska znanstvena disciplina. Dejstvo, ki ga pogosto omenjajo, je, da odsotnost obredov .alovanja v begunstvu podalj.uje .alovanje. Za nobeno kulturo namree ni znano, da bi imela posebne obrede za kulturno ovdovelost. Zdi se, da je med Smrt in .alovanje v begunstvu: Bo.njaki, Bo.njakinje v Sloveniji kulturno dejstvo, da drugih .eg pri procesih .alovanja kot zgolj tistih za umrlimi osebami, ni. Eden izmed glavnih avtorjev je nedvomno Eisenbruch, ki je psihiater in antropolog. Opozoril je, da so procesi .alovanja beguncev in begunk, ki nimajo mo.nosti izvajanja primernih obredov ob smrti, lahko ovirani (1990). Po njegovem mnenju je vzdr.evanje tradicionalne kulture pomemben prilagoditveni mehanizem v begunstvu. Eisenbruch je raziskoval begunce in begunke iz Kampueije v Zdru.enih dr.avah Amerike in Avstraliji in ugotovil, da je .zdravstveno stanje beguncev in begunk izbolj.ano, kadar imajo mo.nost uporabljanja svojih verovanj skozi obrede, skladne z njihovo kulturo in vedenjem. (1990: 193). .ege ob smrti imajo torej, poleg drugih obredov, pomembno vlogo v procesih .alovanja beguncev in begunk. Pomembno je tudi Eisenbru-325 chovo opozorilo, da morajo vsi, ki se ukvarjajo z begunsko problematiko, razumeti .kulturno konstrukcijo realnosti beguncev in begunk.. Veliko beguncev in begunk namree upa, da se bodo vrnili, in .elijo .iveti v preteklosti ter noeejo zgubiti stika z, na primer, domovino (1990: 200). Na ta naein ..ivljenje v preteklosti. zelo pogosto ponovno vzpostavi obeutek identitete, ki ga je razrvala vojna. Mnogi avtorji in avtorice poudarjajo potrebo po tem, da se .ege ob smrti izvajajo in koneujejo v skladu s kulturno tradicijo beguncev in begunk, in opozarjajo, da v mnogih predelih sveta ni tako. Harrell-Bondova in Wilson poroeata o takih primerih v Afriki. Po njunem mnenju je umiranje tisti del socialnega .ivljenja, pri katerem so se ljudje manj pripravljeni prilagajati novim vzorcem (1990: 230). Zatorej se avtorjema zdi pomembno proueevati, kako humanitarni programi doloeajo, na kak.en naein se ljudje sooeijo s smrtjo, in dajati predloge za izbolj.anje teh programov. Zdi se, da je medkulturno dejstvo, da humanitarna pomoe ne vsebuje hrane za sreeanja ljudi po pogrebu in drugih .egah ob smrti. To je znaeilno tako za Slovenijo kot tudi za Afriko, kot poroeata Harrell-Bondova in Wilson. V Sloveniji veeino stro.kov za pogreb prispeva vladni Urad za priseljevanje in begunce, v mnogih krajih po svetu ni tako - na primer v Afriki. Harrell-Bondova in Wilson (1990) predlagata tudi, da bi humanitarne organizacije, ki pomagajo beguncem in begunkam, sponzorirale vojne spominske sveeanosti v begunskih centrih in naselbinah, ee te obstajajo v njihovih dr.avah. Ker begunci in begunke najpogosteje be.ijo zaradi sociopolitienega in militaristienega preganjanja, je tradicionalna kultura v njihovi domovini pogosto zadu.ena in ogro.ena. V medkulturni literaturi o smrti, .alovanju in ovdovelosti v begunstvu najdemo primere, kjer je begunstvo pomenilo edino mo.nost nadaljevanja tradicionalne kulture. Tak.en primer so, na primer, begunci in begunke iz Litve v Zdru.enih dr.avah Amerike po drugi svetovni vojni. Medtem ko so bili za Sovjetsko zvezo po drugi svetovni vojni znaeilni procesi rusifikacije, so imeli begunci in begunke iz Litve v Zdru.enih dr.avah Amerike prilo.nost izvajanja in ohranjanja njihove tradicionalne kulture (Ba.kauskas 1981). Podoben primer so razseljeni Kampueijci v Avstraliji in Zdru.enih dr.avah Amerike, ki so be.ali pred Pol Potovim re.imom v sedemdesetih letih. Tradicionalni zdravitelji in religiozni in.truktorji imajo pomembno vlogo pri ohranjanju tradicionalne kulture v begunstvu. Tradicionalni zdravitelji izseljenih Kampueijcev se imenujejo kruuji. Ljudem pomagajo predelati kulturno ovdovelost in Natalija Vreeer funkcionirajo kot .viri kulturnega znanja. (Eisenbruch 1991: 2). Delujejo kot posredniki med ovdovelimi posamezniki in dru.bo. Poleg tega, da pomagajo ovdovelim, da se ponovno integrirajo v dru.bo, nadzirajo tudi javno artikulacijo osebnih eustev .alovanja. Tudi Bo.njaki, Bo.njakinje v Sloveniji imajo religiozne in.truktorje, ki opravljajo to vlogo, kot bom pojasnila kasneje v besedilu. Zgoraj navedeni primeri nam dokazujejo, da so procesi .alovanja v begunstvu lahko tudi konstruktivni, rezultat katerih je lahko, na primer, tudi ohranitev v domovini ogro.ene tradicionalne kulture. To je .e en dokaz, da so eustva .alovanja normalne reakcije in jih ne moremo patologizirati. Pridru.ujem se besedam Malkkijeve, ki pravi, da .. eeprav je mnogo beguncev in begunk pre.ivelo nasilje in izgube, ki dobesedno prese 326 gajo predstave veeine ljudi, ne smemo predvidevati, da begunski status sam po sebi pomeni prepoznavno psiholo.ko stanje, ki ga lahko posplo.imo. (Malkki 1995: 510). Nekateri drugi avtorji in avtorice, ki se ukvarjajo s problematiko .alovanja in (kulturne) ovdovelosti v begunstvu, so: Eastmond (1988), Flamm (1994 a, b), Woodcock (1991) itd. .ege ob smrti bo.nja.kih beguncev in begunk v Sloveniji Pogrebi Bo.njakov, Bo.njakinj v Sloveniji so podobni tistim v Bosni in Hercegovini, razlikujejo pa se v sklepni stopnji pogreba. Vendar na razlienih slovenskih pokopali.eih dopu.eajo Bo.njakom in Bo.njakinjam, da v veeji ali manj.i meri koneajo pogrebni obred v skladu s svojo tradicijo, kot bom opisala na koncu besedila. Poudariti moram tudi, da tisti Bo.njaki, ki niso prevee religiozni (zlasti komunisti, komunistke), niso pokopani v skladu z bo.nja.ko tradicijo. Med njimi so pogosti zlasti tisti, katerih otroci so .iveli v Sloveniji .e pred vojno v Bosni in Hercegovini, in .elijo, da bi njihove star.e pokopali po slovenskih .egah. Sorodniki umrlih doloeajo, po kateri kulturni praksi bo potekal pokop. Prav tako nekateri begunci in begunke, ki so se .e akulturirali v slovensko dru.bo, sprejemajo njene .ege ob smrti. Veeina Bo.njakov, Bo.njakinj v begunstvu v Sloveniji pa pri pokopu upo.teva naslednje obrede: Ko umre mo.ki ali .enska, ostane telo v hi.i en dan.4 Za pripravo telesa umrlega in za same pogrebne .ege je znaeilna delitev dela po spolu. Ee umre mo.ki, njegovo truplo pripravita hod.a, religiozni ueitelj v srednji .oli, ali imam, prav tako religiozni vodja. Oba opravljata enake naloge.5 Ee umre .enska, njeno telo pripravi bula, religiozna in.truktorica za .enske. Telesa umrlih umijejo in ovijejo v eefin, tkanino. Pomen eefina je v tem, da pridejo vsi enaki, vse enake pred boga. .alujoei ne nosijo ernine. Veasih so .enske nosile ruto, danes jo le nekatere. Po bo.nja.ki tradiciji na grobove ne nosijo ro., saj menijo, da so dejanja Muslimanov tista, ki so najpomembnej.a. Pod vplivom slovenskih pogrebnih obredov nosijo ro.e na grobove tudi nekateri Bo.njaki in Bo.njakinje. 4 Pomanjkanje prostora v begunskih centrih je veasih prepreeilo navado, da je umrla oseba ostala doma en dan. 5 Beseda imam izvira iz arab.eine, beseda hod.a pa ima nacionalno, politieno konotacijo. Smrt in .alovanje v begunstvu: Bo.njaki, Bo.njakinje v Sloveniji Pogreb imenujejo d.enaza. Udele.ujejo se ga lahko le mo.ki. Hod.a uei koran na grobu, vsi molijo, na primer, kabursko dovo, ki je posebna molitev za to prilo.nost. .enske veasih poeakajo ob pokopali.eih ali pripravljajo hrano doma. Ko se mo.ki vrnejo po pogrebu, imajo tevhid, to so po opredelitvi Bringe .islamske kolektivne molitve za du.e umrlih. (1995: 256). Zraven pijejo sokove in jedo. Sedem dni po pogrebu je .e en tevhid, enako po .tiridesetih dneh. Koneni obred po .tiridesetih dneh se imenuje eeteresnica in oznaeuje konec intenzivnega procesa .alovanja. .enskam je po tem dnevu dovoljeno, da gredo iz hi.e, mo.kim pa tako in tako ni bilo potrebno ostati v hi.i 40 dni. Po tem easu se mo.ki lahko spet poroeijo, zlasti ee imajo otroke. Za .enske pravijo, da se jim ni treba ponovno poroeiti, eeprav veasih se. Po letu dni je proces .alovanja konean. Ponovni pokopi so se zaeeli kmalu po koncu vojne, takoj ko je bilo spet varno po-327 tovati po Bosni in Hercegovini. Vendar pa prekopavanja niso prav pogosta. Veeino beguncev in begunk, zlasti starej.ih, ki so umrli v begunstvu v Sloveniji po koncu bosanske vojne, so pokopali v njihovi domovini. V pogovorih, ki sem jih imela s pripadniki, pripadnicami te socialne skupine, so pogosto izrazili, izrazile .eljo, da ne .elijo biti pokopani, pokopane v tujini. V okupiranih obmoejih Bosne in Hercegovine, kot je, na primer, Republika srbska, Bo.njakov in Bo.njakinj .e vedno ne morejo pokopavati v njihovih vaseh in mestih, zato jih pokopljejo v krajih, ki so najbli.ji njihovim domovom. Glede na religijo muslimanov se po smrti zaene veeno .ivljenje. Tisti, ki je delal dobra dela, bo .el v d.enet, nebesa, tisti, ki pa je delal slabe stvari, bo .el v d.ehenen, pekel. Sojenje bo potekalo pred bogom, ki bo presojal o dobrih in slabih delih. Na sodni dan bodo mrtvi spet o.iveli. Smrt je bo.ja volja, zato se mo.ki ali .enska proti njej ne moreta boriti. Ker pa je smrt le pot na drugi svet, naj je ne bi jemali prevee dramatieno, zato prevee eustveno izra.anje .alosti ni kulturno za.eleno. Hod.a, bula in imam obi.eejo .alujoeega po pogrebu. Spomnijo ga, da je smrt posledica bo.je volje. Njihova naloga je tudi, da nadzirajo eustva .alosti in spomnijo .alujoeega, da je .ivljenje veeno in je smrt le prehod na drugi svet. Naslednji govor, katerega namen je povezati .ivljenje in smrt, veasih govorijo pred ali po d.enazi: .Dragi bratje! Danes smo se zbrali, da pospremimo na.ega brata ali sestro, in vsi tukaj prisotni moramo to razumeti kot sporoeilo, da smo vsi smrtniki in da bo za vsakega od nas pri.el eas smrti. Danes se na. brat (sestra) vraea svojemu Stvaritelju. Vsak je kdaj gre.il in potrebuje halal6 , zato dragi bratje, ali ste pripravljeni halaliti na.emu bra- tu vse? Alah je z njim zadovoljen.. Begunski zbirni centri v Sloveniji funkcionirajo kot prostori kolektivnega .alovanja. Kar nekaj ljudi se je preselilo v zbirne begunske centre iz zasebnih namestitev, da so lahko delili izku.nje vojne in begunstva in dobili socialno podporo. To je bilo .e zlasti znaeilno za obdobje vojne v Bosni in Hercegovini, ko so se eustvene vezi v skupnosti okrepile. Solidarnost so izra.ali, izra.ale na razliene naeine. V enem izmed begunskih zbirnih centrov v Ljubljani, na primer, .eni niso povedali, da ji je na fronti v Bosni in Hercegovini umrl mo., saj so menili, da fizieno in psihieno ni dovolj moena, da bi lahko sprejela .alostno novico. Poeakali so, da postane moenej.a in sposobnej.a prenesti izgubo. 6 halal: oprostiti komu Natalija Vreeer Sklep Najveeja razlika med tradicionalnim pokopom v Bosni in Hercegovini in v Sloveniji je, da morajo Bo.njaki, Bo.njakinje v slednjem uporabljati krsto namesto tabuta, ki je, ee si spet sposodim opredelitev Bringe, .krsta brez pokrova, ki jo uporabljajo Bo.njaki, Bo .njakinje, ko nesejo telo umrlega h grobu. (1995: 256). Na nekaterih pokopali.eih, kot na primer na ljubljanskem, ne smejo obrniti kaburja, groba, in mejta, trupla, z desno stranjo proti Meki. Na nekaterih pokopali.eih jim dovolijo, da dajo nekaj zemlje pod krsto, v Ljubljani, na primer, jim to ni dovoljeno. Mesto Maribor je lahko v tem primeru za zgled, saj tam Bo.njaki in Bo.njakinje lahko dokoneajo pogrebne obrede v skladu s svojo tradicijo, 328 izjema je le obvezna uporaba krste. Prav tako je Maribor eno izmed redkih mest v Sloveniji, v katerem so grobovi Bo.njakov in Bo.njakinj skupaj, kot to doloea njihova tradicija. Multikulturni pristop tega mesta v smislu pogrebnih obredov Bo.njakov in Bo.njakinj dokazuje, da upo.tevanje kulturne razlienosti ni gro.nja .homogenosti. dru.be, temvee pomeni korak bli.je k enakopravni civilni dru.bi. Upam, da sem tudi s svojim pisanjem dokazala, da upo.tevanje kulturne razlienosti ni ekonomski problem (in tudi, ee bi veasih bil), temvee problem razumevanja, tolerantnosti in spo.tovanja tujih kulturnih praks. Sklepne .ege ob smrti Bo.njakov in Bo.njakinj nas lahko marsikaj naueijo o obredih, ki olaj.ujejo procese .alovanja. To pa je nekaj, kar bi bilo vredno iskati v na.i na pol izgubljeni tradiciji, ki bi jo bilo mogoee potrebno na novo izumiti . zlasti, kot se zdi, v mestih. LITERATURA BRINGA Tone (1995), Being Muslim the Bosnian Way: Identity and Community in a Central Bosnian Village, New Jersey: Princeton University Press. BA.KAUSKAS Liucija (1981), .The Lithuanian Refugee Experience and Grief., v: International Migration Review, Vol. XV, No. 1-2, str. 276-292. EISENBRUCH Maurice (1984), .Cross-Cultural Aspects of Bereavement. I: A Conceptual Framework for Comparative Analysis., v: Culture, Medicine and Psychiatry 8, str. 283-309. EISENBRUCH Maurice (1990), .Cultural Bereavement and Homesickness., v: Fisher S. and Cooper C. L. On the Move: the Psychology of Change and Transition, John Wiley & Sons Ltd., str. 191-205. EISENBRUCH Maurice (1991), .The Survival of Cambodian Culture through the Traditional Healer: A Responsibility in International Mental Health., Plenary session paper on 21 August, 1991 World Congress, World Federation for Mental Health, Mexico 18-23 August 1991. ENGLUND Harri (1998), .Death, Trauma and Ritual: Mozambican Refugees in Malawi., v: Social Science Medicine, Vol. 46, No. 9, str. 1165-1174. FIRTH Shirley (1997), Dying, Death and Bereavement in a British Hindu Community, Leuven: Peeters. FLAMM Paul (1994 a), .The Role of Ritual in Mourning: A Theoretical Background., Oxford: Refugee Studies Pro gramme, neobjavljeno gradivo. FLAMM Paul (1994 b), .The Role of Ritual in Mourning in the Rwandan Crisis., Oxford: Refugee Studies Programme, neobjavljeno gradivo. FREUD Sigmund (1917), .Mourning and Melancholia., v: The Standard Edition of the Complete Psychological Works of Sigmund Freud (Volume XIV), London: The Hogarth Press and the Institute of Psycho-Analysis, str. 239-261. HARRELL-BOND Barbara E. and Wilson Ken B. (1990), .Dealing with Dying: Some Anthropological Reflections on the Need for Assistance by Refugee Relief Programmes for Bereavement and Burial., v: Journal of Refugee Studies Vol. 3, No. 3, str. 229-243. Smrt in .alovanje v begunstvu: Bo.njaki, Bo.njakinje v Sloveniji MALKKI Liisa H. (1995), .Refugees and Exile: From .Refugee Studies. to the National Order of Things, v: Durham William H. (ed.), Annual Review of Anthropology 24: str. 495-523. ROSENBLATT Paul C., Walsh Patricia R., Jackson A. Douglas (1976), Grief and Mourning in Cross Cultural Perspective, Zdru.ene dr.ave Amerike: Hraf Press. SANDERS Catherine M. (1989), Grief: The Mourning After: Dealing with Adult Bereavement, New York: John Wiley & Sons. DEATH, GRIEF AND MOURNING IN EXILE: BOSNIAN MUSLIMS IN SLOVENIA Natalija Vreeer Key words: grief, mourning, (cultural) bereavement, exiled Bosnian Muslims, refugees, Slovenia Introduction For the purpose of this article I decided to focus on death, grief and mourning of Bosnian Muslims in exile in Slovenia. I think that any understanding of people in exile in Slovenia would be incomplete, if we do not take into account their encounter with death, whether as a threat to their own life which was very often present when they escaped from their home-country, whether the encounter with death was in a loss of relatives and friends or whether we decide to face various symbolic deaths that were characteristic for all the refugees that I met, as all of them suffered many of the following losses: the loss of the home-country with its sociocultural environment, the language, employment, school, drastically changed social networks, decrease in standard etc. Therefore, we can say that mourning processes are characteristic for the life in exile and they occur on personal and collective levels. The mortuary rituals of the Bosnian Muslims are very specific, they differ from the Slovenian ones. My thesis is that the absence of integration of refugees in Slovenia causes some negative consequences also for the mourning processes of refugees. Namely, Muslims in Slovenia can perform the mortuary rituals more or less according to their cultural tradition, but in some cemeteries they are not allowed to complete those rituals in accordance with their tradition as I will explain in the concluding part of my paper. I argue that the completion of funeral rituals in accordance to their tradition would enable them to work through the grieving processes more effectively and besides, it would not represent additional costs for the Slovenian state. In this paper I would like to present you some statistical data on refugees in Slovenia, to describe methodology, to give definitions of the concepts used, to analyse literature on death, grief, mourning and bereavement, which influenced literature of the same topic in exile from the cross-cultural perspective, to analyse literature on death, Death, Grief and Mourning in Exile: Bosnian Muslims in Slovenia grief, mourning and cultural bereavement in exile and to describe briefly mortuary rituals of Bosnian Muslims in Slovenia. Through the text I will also try to give some recommendations for the improved policy toward refugee question regarding the sphere of death, especially regarding the situation of Bosnian Muslims in Slovenia. Refugees in Slovenia and Methodology First refugees (Croats) started to come to Slovenia soon after its independence in June 1991. Bosnian Muslims joined them in 1992. In September 1993 there were 35.000 refugees in Slovenia and a few thousand of those whose status was illegal.1 The status of Bosnian refugees was and still is considered temporary. In legal terms, according to the 331 Slovenian Law of Temporary Asylum from 1997, they are considered asylum seekers, namely, Slovenia has only three refugees according to the Geneva Convention about a Status of Refugee from 1951. The Law of Temporary Asylum allows them to be employed only eight hours per week. Repatriation from Slovenia is gradual, it is not forced. Nowadays (April 1999), there are about 3500 refugees from Bosnia-Herzegovina in Slovenia, approximately 80% are Bosnian Muslims. Approximately half of them live in ten refugee centres, the rest of them live in private arrangements. There are additional 2500 refugees from Kosovo without a legal status yet, namely, they neither have a status of refugees according to Geneva Convention from 1951, neither of asylum seekers according to the Slovenian Law of Temporary Asylum, but of foreigners before deportation.2 The absence of integration of refugees is characteristic for Slovenia. Children and adolescents attend schools, therefore, they integrate into the Slovenian society more than other social groups. Thus, they have the opportunity to learn Slovene, while most of their parents remain in the refugee collective centres and do not have many opportunities to mix with the host population. The refugees in Slovenia are left in the uncertainty of their temporary status, in the so called .limbo. and wait for the repatriation. Their situation resembles Waiting for Godo.s story as their houses in Bosnia-Herzegovina are destroyed or occupied by the Serbs (especially in the Republika srbska) and the prospects for the return are unsure, fixed somewhere in the distant future. The method of my research was ethnographic. From August 1992 to December 1994 I did the fieldwork in Celje, from January 1995 until now in Ljubljana, I also visited refugee camp in Maribor. Definitions Let me first define the concepts grief, mourning, bereavement and cultural bereavement that I use in the paper. The concepts grief, mourning and bereavement are often used interchangeably. However, there are differences in meaning. By grief I mean 1 I would like to thank the governmental Office for Immigration and Refugees for the statistical data. 2 In April 1999 Slovenia decided to accept another 1600 refugees from Kosovo who are entering the Slovenian state gradually and to reactivate the Slovenian Law of Temporary Asylum which will be valid also for the refugees from Kosovo. Natalija Vreeer different emotions that arise from the response to loss. Among these emotions Rosenblatt, Walsh and Jackson (1976: 9) enumerate sorrow, anxiety, guilt, loneliness, anger, fear, numbness and general tension. According to Firth, mourning is the way in which such emotions are expressed, .often in a culturally determined ways, and often for a specified time in a particular society. (1997: 9). To define bereavement I will use Rosenblatt, Walsh and Jackson.s definition: bereavement is ..the period of time following a death, during which grief occurs, and also the state experiencing grief. (1976: 2). Eisenbruch defines cultural bereavement as a loss of culture and society (1990). In this way cultural bereavement encompasses collective grief and refers to various symbolic deaths and to the experience of exile as a whole. 332 Death, Grief, Mourning and Bereavement in Cross- Cultural Perspective: Studies that Influenced those with the Same Topic in Exile For the purpose of this article I will mention only the main authors who influenced the literature on death, grief, mourning and bereavement in exile. One of the earliest and still one of the most important was definitely Freud.s essay on Mourning and Melancholia (1917). In this essay he uses the word mourning interchangeably with grief and melancholia refers to what is now called depression. One of the main contributions of Freud.s work is that he paid attention to the intrapsychic processes which occur during the losses. According to Freud grieving is a process that has to be worked through in order to be completed and gradual withdrawal of libido or the emotional energy is needed from the lost object in order to be reinvested into a new object. The main implications of Freud.s work for the refugee studies are the following: 1. Grieving is a normal process and certain lapse of time is needed for this the so called grief work to be worked through, therefore it is not a pathological reaction. However, Freud also gives a very good insight into situations in which the inhibited grief would appear. That people and particularly refugees need time to grieve3 is a finding which is echoed later also by many authors as, for example, (Englund: 1998, Eisenbruch: 1984, Harrell-Bond and Wilson: 1990) who emphasized that especially western trained health professionals should give time to the refugees to work through the grieving and mourning processes and not to pathologize their reactions as it is still too often the case. However, the belief that grief is an illness, is still present, especially among psychologists and some psychiatrists as, for example, Engel (1961), Sanders (1989) etc. Sanders describes the emotions of grief as symptoms and, unfortunately, she does not seem to be the only one who approaches normal reactions as symptoms. 2. In Freud.s opinion depression is .in some way related to an object-loss which is withdrawn from consciousness, in contradistinction to mourning, in which there is nothing about the loss that is unconscious. (1917: 245). In refugee situa 3 The emphasis is mine. Death, Grief and Mourning in Exile: Bosnian Muslims in Slovenia tion when many losses occur at the same time, we can suspect that some of them and the way of their intertwining (cf. to Malkki 1995) might be hidden from refugee.s consciousness and therefore even more difficult to work through. In order to explain the stages of the grief processes, many authors draw on psychology. Ba.kauskas (1981) writes about the Lithuanian refugees in the USA and follows Marris.s stages in grief process which are conservatism, bereavement and innovation. According to the psychologist Sanders (1989), these stages are the following: 1. shock 2. awareness 3. conservation-withdrawal 4. healing-the turning point 5. renewal In spite of the fact that such analysis is sometimes useful, we have to be careful not to apply these generalizations universally. They differ from culture to culture and we can expect that also from one individual to another (cf. to Stroebe, in: Firth 1997: 9/10). Every individual in every society experiences losses during his life time as consequences of lost attachments, therefore grief is present in every culture. However, there are many differences in mourning processes in different sociocultural environments. There are also differences in the emotional expressions of grief as well. Rosenblatt, Walsh and Jackson did the research in 78 cultures on the basis of ethnographic descriptions. One of their findings is also, for example, that the repression of feelings is in some cultures considered normal (Bali), while in some other cultures it is important to retain ties with the deceased (Egypt). Most of the literature focuses on the role of ritual in mourning. Flamm.s review gives a theoretical background of this topic and focuses on the anthropological and psychological literature. One of the most frequently quoted authors is Hertz who saw .mortuary rites as reflections of the social order which in turn is the objective expression of the concepts and values of a given society. (quoted in Flamm 1994 a: 4). However, Bloch and Parry claim that the rituals bring about the social order and view these rituals as a political exercise used to legitimate the existing authority within a society (1982, quoted in Flamm 1994 a: 6). Rosenblatt, Walsh and Jackson drew on Van Gennep and viewed mortuary rituals as .providing status passage, both for the dead and for the bereaved. A dead person, over the cycle of death ceremonies, is passed from the land of the living to the land of the dead; a bereaved person is passed from the state of the mourner to the state of the nonmourner. (1976: 7). Leach wrote that there seems to be an agreement that ritual is an universal feature of human societies. According to him, ritual is a social phenomenon which communicates the basic concepts and values of a given society. Funeral rituals also help the mourner to re-integrate into society and enable the wider social group to maintain its continuity and to re-affirm its own values and beliefs (in: Flamm 1994 a: 8-9). Natalija Vreeer Many authors also emphasize that the lack of mortuary rituals once the funeral is over in Western societies creates further problems for the bereaved as there is no final ceremony which would put a time limit on the bereavement period and in this way grief is prolonged (Rosenblatt, Walsh & Jackson 1976, Firth 1997 etc.). Other important authors are Van Gennep (1908), Durkheim (1915), Goody (1962), Radcliffe-Brown (1964), Gorer (1965), Turner (1969), Munroz (1984), Bloch and Parry (1982), Bloch (1988), etc. The Cross-Cultural Literature on Grief, Mourning and 334 (Cultural) Bereavement in Exile It started to appear in the 80.s, when refugee studies were established as a special academic discipline. A fact that is very often mentioned is that the absence of the institutionalized mourning processes in exile prolongs the duration of grief as no culture is known to have special rituals for cultural bereavement. Namely, it seems to be a cross- cultural fact that there are not known any mourning practices other than those regarding death of relatives. One of the key authors is definitely Eisenbruch, a psychiatrist and an anthropologist, who warned that refugees who are deprived of adequate mortuary rituals might experience arrested grief (1990). He considers the culture maintenance an important adjustment mechanism in exile. Eisenbruch researched Cambodian refugees in the USA and Australia and found out that .the well-being of refugees was improved when they were allowed to validate their beliefs through culturally appropriate rituals and behaviour. (1990:193). Mortuary rituals, beside other rituals, therefore, play a very important role in the grief processes of refugees. Eisenbruch.s another important point is his plea for all involved in refugee matters to try to.understand the refugee.s cultural construction of reality., namely, many exiles nurture a hope of return and wish to live in the past and do not want to loose their attachment to, for example, homeland (1990: 200). Thus .living in the past. very often reconstitutes the sense of identity which was disrupted by war. Many authors emphasized the need for mortuary rituals to be performed and completed according to the cultural tradition of refugees and that in many parts of the world it is not so as, for example, Harrell-Bond and Wilson report for Africa. According to these authors dealing with dying is an area of social life in which people are less willing to adjust to new patterns (1990:230). They, therefore, consider it important to investigate how refugees cope with death under assistance programmes in order to help to implement them. It seems to be a cross-cultural fact that there is no food given by humanitarian aid for social gatherings around funeral and other mortuary rites. This is true also for Slovenia and also, for example, Africa as Harrell-Bond and Wilson report. In Slovenia refugees get almost all the costs of the funeral covered by the Slovenian Office for Refugees and Immigrants, but in many places in the world they have to pay themselves (Africa). Harrell-Bond and Wilson (1990) also suggest that refugee assisting agencies should sponsor war memorials in refugee camps and settlements if they exist in their country. Death, Grief and Mourning in Exile: Bosnian Muslims in Slovenia As refugees most usually escape from sociopolitical and military persecution, the traditional culture in their home country is often suppressed and endangered. In the cross-cultural literature on death, grief and bereavement in exile we find examples, where the exile represented the only possibility for the continuation of traditional culture. Such an example are the Lithuanians exiled in the USA after the second world war. While in post second world war Soviet Union intensive processes of rusification were occuring, the Lithuanians in the USA had a chance to practice and preserve their traditional culture (Ba.kauskas 1981). Another example are resettled Cambodians in Australia and the USA fleeing from Pol Pot regime in the seventies. Traditional healers and religious instructors play very important role in preserving traditional culture in exile. The traditional healers of exiled Cambodians are cal-335 led kruus. They help people to overcome cultural bereavement and function as .repositories of cultural knowledge. (Eisenbruch 1991: 2). They function as mediators, brokers between the bereaved individual and the society. Beside helping the bereaved to become integrated into the society, they also control public articulation of private emotions of grief. Bosnian Muslims in Slovenia also have religious instructors who perform that role, which I will explain later on in the text. The above-mentioned examples show us that grief processes in exile can also be very constructive processes that result, for example, in preserving the endangered traditional culture. This is another proof that the emotions of grief are normal reactions and can not be pathologized. I would echoe Malkki.s words that ..although many refugees have survived violence and loss that are literally beyond the imagination of most people, we must not assume that refugee status in and of itself constitutes a recognizable, generalizable psychological condition. (Malkki 1995: 510). Some other authors who dealt with the theme of grief, mourning and (cultural) bereavement in exile are: Eastmond (1988), Flamm (1994 a, b), Woodcock (1991) etc. Mortuary Rituals of Bosnian Muslim Refugees in Slovenia The funerals of Bosnian Muslims in Slovenia resemble those in Bosnia-Herzegovina, but very often with the exception of the final stage of the funeral. However, in some Slovenian cemeteries, they allow Bosnian Muslims to finish their funeral practices according to their tradition to a greater extent and in some to a lesser extent as I will explain at the end. I also have to emphasize that those Muslims who are not very religious (especially communists) do not practice all of the traditional practices. Among them are also children of some refugees who lived in Slovenia for decades before the war in Bosnia-Herzegovina and want to have their parents buried near them and sometimes according to the Slovenian practices. Namely, the relatives of the deceased decide which cultural practices will be followed at the burial. Some of those refugees who have already acculturated to the Slovenian society sometimes accept its mortuary practices. Natalija Vreeer However, most of the Bosnian Muslims in exile in Slovenia follow the following mortuary rituals. When a man or a woman dies, the body stays in the house one day.4 A gendered division of labour is characteristic for the preparation of the dead body and also for the funeral. If a man dies, hod.a, a religious secondary school teacher or imam, who is also a religious leader, prepare the body for the funeral. Their roles are interchangeable.5 If a woman dies, bula, who is a female religious instructor, prepares her body. Bodies are washed and wrapped in eefin, a shroud. The meaning of eefin is that everybody will come in front of god the same. Those who mourn do not wear black, it was a tradition that women wore scarf, nowadays only some women wear it. According to the Muslim tradition, flowers are not to be put on the grave as it is believed that the 336 deeds of the Muslims are the most important. However, because of the influence of the Slovenian mortuary rites, some Bosnian Muslims also bring flowers on graves. The funeral of Bosnian Muslims is called d.enaza, only men are allowed to attend it. Hod.a teaches Koran on the grave and they tell prayers, as, for example, kaburska dova, which is a special prayer for this occasion. Women sometimes wait outside the cemetery or prepare food at home. When men return home after the funeral, they have tevhid, which are, according to Bringa.s definition, .Islamic collective prayers for the souls of the dead. (1995: 256). They also drink juices and eat. Seven days after the funeral there is another tevhid, as well as on the 40th day and very often after a year. The final ceremony forty days after the burial is called eeteresnica, which marks the ending of the intensive mourning process. Women are allowed to go out of the house now, however, it was not necessary for men to stay in the house for 40 days. After that time men are allowed to remarry, especially if they have children, women, they say, do not need to remarry again, although they sometimes do. After one year the mourning process is supposed to end. Reburials started to occur soon after the end of war, when it became safe to travel to Bosnia-Herzegovina. However, reburials are not very frequent. Many refugees who die in exile in Slovenia after the Bosnian war are buried in their home country, especially the elderly. In our conversations the members of this social group frequently expressed a wish that they do not want to be buried in a foreign country. In the occupied places of Bosnia-Herzegovina as it is the Republika srbska, for example, they still can not be buried in their villages and towns, therefore they bury them in the places which are nearest to their real homes. According to Muslim religion the eternal life starts after death. The one who did good deeds will go to d.enet, heaven, the one who did bad deeds will go to d.ehenen, hell. Judgement will occur in front of God, where good and evil deeds will be judged. When the judgement day will occur, all the dead will become alive again. Death is god.s destiny, a man or a woman can not fight against death. As death is only the way to the other world, it should not be taken very dramatically, therefore too many emotional expressions of grief are not culturally appropriate. Hod.a, bula and imam visit the bereaved after the burial. They remind the bereaved that death was a consequence of 4 The lack of space in refugee centres sometimes prevented the custom that a dead person stayed at home for a day. 5 The word imam derives from Arabic, while the word hod.a is a national notion, with a political connotation. Death, Grief and Mourning in Exile: Bosnian Muslims in Slovenia god.s will. It is the task of hod.a, bula and imam to control the emotions of grief and to remind the bereaved that life is eternal and death is merely a passage to another world. The following speech, the intention of which is to connect life and death, is sometimes spoken before or after d.enaza: .Dear brothers! We have gathered today to see our brother or sister off and all of us present here should take that as a message, that we are all mortals and the time of death will come for us, too. Today our brother (sister) is returning to his (her) Creator. Everybody has once sinned and he (she) needs halal6 , so dear brothers, are you willing to halal7 our brother for everything? Allah is satisfied with him.. Refugee collective centres in Slovenia function as places of collective grief. Quite a number of people moved to the centres from private arrangements in order to share 337 their war and exile experiences and get social support. This was especially characteristic during the war in Bosnia-Herzegovina when the feelings of community were strenghtened. Solidarity was expressed in different ways. In one of the refugee collective centres in Ljubljana, they, for example, did not tell a woman that her husband died on the front in Bosnia-Herzegovina, because they considered her physically and psychologically too weak. They waited that she would get stronger and would be able to face the loss. Conclusion What differs from the traditional burial from Bosnia-Herzegovina is that in Slovenia they have to use coffins instead of tabut, which is, if I borrow Bringa.s definition again .a lidless coffin used by Muslims for carrying a dead body to the grave. (1995: 256). In some towns as, for example in Ljubljana, they also can not orient kabur, the grave and mejt, which is the body of the dead person with their right sides towards Mecca. In some cemeteries they are allowed to shovel the earth underneath the grave themselves, not in Ljubljana, for example. Maribor can set an example, because refugees there are allowed to comp7lete all the mortuary rituals according to their cultural tradition, the only exception is the obligatory use of the coffin. Maribor is also one of the rare towns in Slovenia, in which the graves of Muslims are together as their tradition demands. This city.s multiculturalist approach regarding mortuary rituals of Bosnian Muslims proves that acknowledging cultural diversity is not a threat to the .homogeneity. of society, but a step toward more egalitarian civil society. I hope that I have proved once again that acknowledging cultural diversity is not a financial matter (and even if it would sometimes be so), but a matter of understanding, tolerance and respect for foreign cultural practices. The final ceremonies of Bosnian Muslims can also teach us about very appropriate mortuary rituals for working through the grief and this may be something important to search for in our half-forgotten tradition, maybe to reinvent it again, as it seems it would be needed at least in the cities. 6 halal = that we forgive him 7 in original: halaliti Natalija Vreeer LITERATURE see page 328 BESEDA O AVTORICI Natalija Vreeer, mag., pi.e doktorat o antropologiji beguncev in begunk na Oddelku za etnologijo in kulturno antropologijo, Filozofska fakulteta, Ljubljana. Zaposlena je na Mirovnem in.titutu v Ljubljani. Njen strokovni interes je zlasti v prepletanju psiholo.ke in feministiene antropologije z begunskimi .tudijami in problematiko elovekovih 338 pravic. Objavila je .tevilne elanke iz omenjenih (pod)disciplin in uredila zbornik Vsakdanje .ivljenje beguncev in begunk v Sloveniji. ABOUT THE AUTHOR Natalija Vreeer, M. A. is in the writing phase of the Ph.D. about the anthropology of refugees at the Department of Ethnology and Cultural Anthropology, Faculty of Arts, Ljubljana. She is employed at the Peace Institute, Ljubljana. Her scientific interest lies in the intertwining of psychological anthropology, feminist anthropology, refugee studies and human rights issues. She has published several articles from the above (sub)disciplines and edited a miscellany The Everyday Life of Refugees in Slovenia.